For a new feature here on Daddy's Sugar Ball we are asking celebrities to answer a legitimate question from an actual advice column. We reached out to ESPN Around the Horn panelist and Fanhouse writer Jay Mariotti for his thoughts on a question posted in Marie Claire's Ask & Answer forum.

Marie Claire reader: My boyfriend and I keep on fighting. We argue all the time. We really love each other, but having at least three fights every week seems unavoidable now. All of the fights are about stupid things or I say something and he gets pissed off and we end up fighting. Help! I am really sick and tired of these fights.

                       

Jay Mariotti: Clearly the problem is you.  Ask yourself the following questions:

Do you listen and obey when your boyfriend tells you something?
Is you boyfriend always right?
Does your hate for White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen burn with the white hot intensity of a thousand burning suns?
Is your boyfriend the smartest guy of every room he walks in?
Does the loudest, most obnoxious person always win the argument?
Do you ears bleed listening to Woody Paige's absurd and incoherent ramblings?

If you even hesitated before answering "YES" on any of these, I can't help you. By now, you should have accepted all of these facts and they should be second nature to you.

In my own relationship, my girlfriend and I scream and yell at each other all the time when we're out in public. That doesn't mean I don't love her, it just means she doesn't know when to shut her big mouth. Following in the footsteps of great men before me like rock legend Ike Turner, football hero Jim Brown, and sitcom star Charlie Sheen, it isn't until we get home that I'm able to really teach her a lesson she won't soon forget. And you don't want that to happen to you...do you now? So do yourself a favor and lose the attitude and just maybe you'll come out of this without any bruises.

DSB would like to thank Jay Mariotti for taking the time out of his busy schedule which includes his arrest, incarceration, and bail hearings to participate in our new feature.

Thanks for coming and suckling Daddy’s Sugar Ball…