The Woman Who Drives Really Slow In My Parking Garage:     

   
  Excuse me... I am having trouble fitting my huge SUV (that I can't drive) into this space...

Why she is STILL a Jerk:  You may remember the 40-something woman in the tan CR-V that drives excruciatingly slow in my parking garage that I admitted to the Jerk Store back in September.  (If not, here is a link.) Well this morning during my slushy morning commute I ended up behind this awful woman once again but instead of her normal tan CR-V she was driving an even larger vehicle…a Lexus SUV and quite a large one at that.  Let’s take a moment to reflect on that…she upgraded to a larger vehicle.  Was the one that you were too fearful to drive not big enough for you?  Did you feel the need to get a car so large that there would never be a chance that you could park it no matter how expansive the space?  Not only did she buy a bigger car, she bought one that was twice as expensive. Some idiot employer actually promoted this frail woman.  The fact that she is capable of not only maintaining employment but also achieving some modicum of success nearly made my head explode into a fine pink mist this morning.  (In case you are wondering her new car is also tan.  Way to be adventurous!)  She treated her last car like a yacht pulling into a slip barely large enough for it moorings.  This gargantuan SUV must be like navigating the Knock Nevis up the Susquehanna during a drought for her.  She crawled through the parking garage at a speed that would make a quaaluded three toed sloth look like it was Neo on meth.  I am very close to finding a new parking lot.  I am almost willing to walk further from my current location just so I can avoid this Jerk…I am not sure I can tolerate her much longer.

                                         
                                 I had nothing to do with that fire... I swear.

Thanks for coming and suckling on Daddy's Sugar Ball...
Bearcat