Here is the latest in Entertainment News as only DSB can bring to you...

Oprah: “I’m outta here…someday.”

                                               

Oprah announced last week that she would be ending her wildly popular talk show… in September of 2011.  Two freaking years from now.  Brett Favre is envious of Oprah.  If only he had thought about announcing his retirement years in advance then he could have started the will-he-won’t-he circus years in advance.  How about announcing the end of the show at the beginning of your 25th year instead of so far ahead it just seem stupid to have any reaction to it at all.  How are we supposed to care that you are calling it quits in two years?  In not-so-unrelated news Dr. Phil has promised not to quit… this disappointed nearly everyone.

Cruise-ing for a bruising:

                                                      
                                    Scientology:  Because he was not a D-Bag enough without it.

In Spain, two women were injured on the set of the new Tom Cruise/Cameron Diaz film after seven bulls escaped from their pen during shooting for the action comedy Knight and Day.  DSB’s crack European investigative team has uncovered that the bulls tried to escape after learning that they would be involved in a Tom Cruise film.  Spain is the only modern industrialized nation to not view this as animal cruelty.

Jon and Kate + Eight + A Team of Blood Thirsty Trial Lawyers:

                                    
             If I had to wear all that crap around my neck for a renewal of vows I would leave her too...

Tonight is the end of the of Jon and Kate + Eight reality series.  At the end of season three, Jon and Kate were renewing their wedding vows on a beach in Hawaii; at the end of season four, Jon and Kate are using lawyers as trebuchets to launch mud at what most would consider an alarming rate.  The series (in one season) went from ten million viewers to barely one million.  Apparently watching a trainwreck on reality TV is only fun when it does not look like the millions of trainwrecks that end in divorce ever year.  Day trips to beaches and amusement parks are cute with eight little rugrats, but when you are on the Today Show couch or Larry King’s set the next day slinging shit about money missing from joint accounts people get tired of your messed up life quite quickly.  Maybe instead of families on reality TV we should focus on drunk single men and women hooking up on dating shows with D-Listers.  At least no kids get hit in that cross fire.

Adam Lambert… dude looks like a lady:

                                               

After Sunday’s broadcast of the American Music Awards (the lamest of all music award shows) Jennifer Lopez should be thanking American Idol runner-up Adam Lambert for stealing the show.  Lopez whose boxing ring lip-sync was so bad that she was mouthing words that have never existed would have been the story had it not been for Lambert’s man-on-man lip lock and simulated BJ.  I am not easily offended, but this really got to me.  No...not the man-on-man kiss.  I don’t need/want to see it, but that did not offend me. What offended me is Lambert is claiming that his lip lock with the piano man was “not planned but in the moment.”  Bullshit.  In a gay sex-charged performance that had choreographed simulated sex all over the place and in which Lambert admitted that he wanted to push the envelope - - it was planned.  Just have the decency to be honest Lambert.  You felt repressed on American Idol either because you wanted to win or because you were managed that way and now you want everyone to know just how gay you are.  We get it; you are very, very gay…Just be honest about your performance and don’t treat us like we don’t know any better.

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Bearcat