Pete Rose:

                                
                             Does this look like a Hall of Famer to you?

Why he is a Jerk:  As far as I'm concerned this is the only Hall of Fame he should get into.  I know that Max Power basically made a half-assed argument for his eventual induction because "the Hall of Fame is not complete without him."  But that is complete bullshit.  The Hall is complete because it is without him.  Pete Rose might have done more to injure the integrity of the game than all the PED users put together.  But Bearcat, they cheated and Pete Rose only bet on games for his team to win.  That is right and Max Power said "If that wasn’t true, baseball would have released that fact years ago to lay stake to the high ground in the court of public opinion." in reference to his wagering only on his team to win. But even if you believe that Rose only bet on his own team when he was Cincinnati manager, wouldn't he be motivated to manage more precisely in games he bet on? Wouldn't he be likely to exhaust his resources in games he bet on, thus leaving his team dead tired or burned out for games he didn't? If you use your entire pitching staff trying desperately to win a game you wagered on, what's left for tomorrow?  More importantly if you did not bet on certain games are you less likely to care about winning those games?  Rose has always acted like saying he only bet on his team to win was some magic salve that would cool the hate against his obvious misdeeds but it makes not freaking sense.  If he got in deep, and what degenerate gambler hasn't, is it not much more likely that he would bet against his team than to double down for a win.  Max Power talked about the integrity of the game and listed Gaylord Perry as proof that cheaters get in to the Hall but the difference between an emery board/some Vaseline and a betting form and 'roids is so wide that I can't even discuss them in the same breath.  Rose did more to damage the game then anyone else prior to the PED era and the idea of letting him in prior to his death (if ever) is just too much.  Rose is a Hall of Fame Jerk not a Hall of Fame baseball player.

Daniel Suelo:

                        
                            This is what I think of your monetary system! 
 By the way, can I bum a couple bucks to get a pack of smokes and a bottle of Thunderbird?

Why he is a Jerk: You probably don't know Daniel Suelo unless you are one of those homo metrosexual guys that reads Details magazine.  Details wrote up about Mr. Suelo in a cover piece that you can read here or you can just finish this paragraph and I can boil it down for you.  Mr. Suelo has decided to live without money.  Normally this would be called being a bum, homeless or a hobo but he has made a conscience decision to live without money.  He blogs about this (for free from the local library) so that makes him something other than your typical vagrant.  He even lives in a cave and if you don't think he is a jerk after reading this quote from the article then I don't know what to tell you... "UNLIKE THE average American—wallowing in credit-card debt, clinging to a mortgage, terrified of the next downsizing at the office—he isn’t worried about the economic crisis. That’s because he figured out that the best way to stay solvent is to never be solvent in the first place. Nine years ago, in the autumn of 2000, Suelo decided to stop using money. He just quit it, like a bad drug habit.  His dwelling, hidden high in a canyon lined with waterfalls, is an hour by foot from the desert town of Moab, Utah, where people who know him are of two minds: He’s either a latter-day prophet or an irredeemable hobo. Suelo’s blog, which he maintains free at the Moab Public Library, suggests that he’s both. “When I lived with money, I was always lacking,” he writes. “Money represents lack. Money represents things in the past (debt) and things in the future (credit), but money never represents what is present.”   Fuck this guy... Money is part having a civil society.  It is people like him that make soft headed hippies try to live off trading clean socks and pot brownies at Phish concerts.  “We are breaking the hold of the corporate machine with our drum circle, man.” Lucky for us Jerk Store membership does not require any cash.

Ben Silverman:

                                    
              My mommy makes me wear this so that I don't get a booboo on my head.

Why he is a Jerk:  Ben Silverman was the co-chairman of NBC Entertainment and Universal Media Studios until he quit this week.  Silverman was the man who created MTV’s Parental Control and Date My Mom (at least we know who to blame), brought The Office stateside, and was responsible for Ugly Betty (who watches that crap) and The Biggest Loser.  Silverman was supposed to be the man to save TV.  How did that work out? Oh yeah, I remember NBC is still in last place amongst the big broadcasters (CBS, ABC, Fox and NBC). This is the guy that gave Jimmy Fallon a late night gig... that would be reason enough to get him into the Jerk Store but there are other reasons. Examples: To celebrate his production company's 24 Emmy nominations in 2007 he threw a huge house party in Hollywood Hills, replete with bikini babes dancing on pool rafts and a rented, caged white tiger. Of the party, Silverman defended himself like a true gentleman: "You looked around and saw so many beautiful women. But then you looked closer and it's like, Hey, that's Molly Sims. See what I mean? Just a totally sick party."  I would do the same thing if I was worth nine figures but if I was the head of NBC I doubt I would be as public as he was about it.  He pissed off the competition with gems like this one from an Esquire interview "The industry hasn't seen an executive like me in a long time. Traditionally, development executives rise through a specific subsection of the TV business—prime time, network, scripted programming. They're basically D-girls," he says, using the derogatory industry slang for cute young development execs with little power. "That's what [ABC Entertainment president] Steve McPherson is, that's what [Fox Entertainment president] Kevin Reilly is. That's bad vernacular, but they're all D-girls."  Nice one.  But his real down fall was pushing absolute garbage onto the airways time and time again...Such stinkers as a remake of Australia's Kath and Kim, a reboot of American Gladiator, the one hour Ford commercial that was Knight Rider… the strange and painful drama Kings was pushed to no end but excellent shows like Friday Night Lights were left to flounder in crappy time slots that had either no viewers or crushing competition that it would never gain traction against.  What I never understood was how could the dog-chasing-its-tail Hollywood “news” media keep calling a 40 year old man a "wunderkind."  Being a middle-aged wunderkind is reason enough to justify Jerk Store admission.

Thanks for coming and suckling on Daddy's Sugar Ball,
Bearcat